A young woman wrote to me recently about her desire to do more for birthing women within the Association, while at the same wondering if it could be the right thing to do. She is also the mother of five little girls. She expressed how teaching and how doing birth work makes her “heart sing.”
She said that when she came away from other educational birth workshops that she had helped to lead in the past, where she had been able to make a difference, even when it was sometimes just for even one woman, she had felt like it was worth it.
She wanted some time to ponder and pray about whether she could do all that was required to make her house a home first, and still be able to throw herself into serving with the Association. Does she have enough room on her plate, she wonders? She would love to serve birthing families, but would it be too tempting to not do the everyday things at home as she joyfully served in this area that calls to her? She realizes how important it is in a mother’s life to keep a home in order, to give her children with the dedication they need, and to serve her family.
She also feels drawn to birth work, and to helping others at this crucial time in their lives. She wants to jump in feet first, but wants to do it right, and in a way that she will be able to keep her priorities straight. If she can figure it out, she believes that it will work out “beautifully”. She hoped I didn’t mind her sharing the “nitty gritty” of it.
Knowing intimately the nitty gritty of this subject, some thoughts came to me to share from her, things that I think are already budding in her own heart and thoughts. These are things that I have learned over the years of putting into order my life.
Before I ever became a mother, I had long ago decided I would dedicate my life fully to my family. I didn’t have any idea that, for me, it would include homeschooling my children.
My own mother taught me of how important being a full-time mother is. My church is also very family-oriented. I grew up with the increasing realization that motherhood and raising my children well was one of the most important things I could ever achieve and it could not be accomplished well on a part-time basis. Why then, was I lead down this other path of helping additional families, as well?
Why also has God continually inspired me for the past more than eighteen years, to also learn everything I can and then to go forth and serve pregnant, birthing, and new families? How do I do all of the missions I’ve been called to do, well? Honestly, I sometimes don’t. I am human and still learning, and sometimes I have those moments of feeling I am not doing enough.
I hardly ever watch TV and don’t spend a lot of time on the internet except on my birth work or in helping others. I am glad I can choose where to spend my time.
I do work daily on accomplishing my family tasks first. And I do have more help, as most parents do, as my children grow older and can do more for themselves under our guidance. Still, even as some of my children are growing into adulthood now, they still require our help as they navigate through the mists of darkness into the unknown.
My to-do lists do at times seem endless. But then I remind myself of Who is in charge. I hope I am doing all He needs me to do, and not letting Him down. I think of when Jesus Christ once fed a multitude with just a few loaves and fishes given to him by a young boy. I go forward having faith, doing the very best I can, that what I give will be magnified. I know that as I do each of the things I am inspired to do, He will be able to trust in me to do what needs doing. Yes, I can make time for compassionate service outside of my home. I am willing, even when my responsibilities are sky high, through I acknowledge that I can do more during some seasons of our lives than during other seasons, such as during a pregnancy perhaps, to be at the crossroads for others.
This is what I shared with this young, strong woman who feels drawn to this work. She gave me permission to share our conversation:
Birth also needs doing as well. There are vital things to be done to change things for the better for babies, moms, and families. This is such a crucial time in the life of a family.
I believe that what happens in the home is the most significant and consequential thing we can ever do. I hope my husband and I will be able to raise our children to make the world a better place; when it comes time to shoot the arrows from our quivers into the world, I want so much that they will fly straight and true. This happens best by example. It is essential for children to see their parents living all of the missions they've been given. I believe my children need to see that God, my husband, and they themselves, in that order, come first in my life. I also believe it is imperative for them to observe their parents’ willingness to step outside their own little bubbles on this planet, reaching out to others who are in need. Compassionate care of others can be accomplished in many ways. There are chances to help people all around us. But sometimes there are in-depth missions He has for us well. And I am preaching to the choir, of course, because I don't doubt this is a central theme in your life too. I admire you that you want to be sure that you do things in order. That is very important to the success of your life overall.
Yes, pondering and praying are key…. The thing is that when you get the answer, you act on it. If you don't, you won't continue to be given the jobs or the level of inspiration God has for you. If this is right for you, the Lord will increase your abilities and will help you to learn to do more, and be His hands in more ways, than you ever realized possible. I believe he will lead you to ways to do more in a more efficient way.
What you have to offer the Association, and thus birthing families, are exclusively yours. What are the talents and skills you have developed over the years? Do you tweet? Would you be good at getting the word out about teleconference trainings and other news items on Facebook, in FB groups, etc. Are you punctual? Are you good with people? Do you have experience making audios or videos? Have you sent out press-releases? Are you good at taxes? Are you compassionate? Are you good at planning things and carrying them out? Are you good at writing? I can see you are. I wouldn't expect you would be proficient in all of these. But you have been developing abilities as a mother, as a workshop leader, and in many other things.
If this is right for you, God has been preparing you to begin. And then He will increase your skills as you continue.
Though it would be this woman’s ideal to stay comfortably in her small (and yes, vitally important) sphere, she passionately and with excitement, agreed that there was more that she desired to do for others. She listed a variety of talents she hoped to be able to use as soon as she had the confirmation from God that this was indeed right for her and her family.
I want to be sure that my readers understand that I don’t condone neglect of home and family. Whatever the popular cry of the day is, concerning where a woman’s place is, I don’t believe in leaving our children in the care of others to go in search of honor and prestige or to obtain non-necessities. Sacrifice for your family is not sacrifice at all.
It is also very important that you know that it is right to give of your time. You are welcome to email the Association if these thoughts speak to you.